My Wife Came From A Thousand Years Ago

Chapter 167: Santa Claus is real

Chapter 167: Santa Claus is real

Compared to Xu Qing's bouncing movements, Jiang He seemed to almost fly—lightly and nimbly hopping up to hang there. Then, mimicking Xu Qing’s style, she brushed her hair back, perfectly replicating his gestures.

"Cool!"

Xu Qing snapped a few photos, then jogged off to retrieve the basketball and handed it back to Zhao Yu. With a basket of groceries in hand, he walked home with Jiang He.

"With these skills in basketball and soccer, the national team might have hope... if only Jiang He weren’t a woman."

“Ever thought about opening a martial arts school? There’s so much fake kung fu these days. If you taught the real stuff, you’d definitely be packed.”

"Teach kung fu?" Jiang He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah, not now, but maybe later. Have you ever thought about it? It’s such a shame for real Chinese martial arts to be lost." Xu Qing’s mind wandered to Lin Chong, the legendary martial arts instructor of the Eighty Thousand Imperial Guards.

Setting aside all the chaotic restrictions and challenges, if Jiang He were to join the sports world as a coach—whether for long-distance running, sprinting, weightlifting, or ball games—she could claim a Grand Slam. But then they’d likely introduce rules banning Chinese kung fu from competitions. Otherwise, the Olympics might be over.

That said, genuine traditional martial arts still had practitioners among the masses—like those who could pierce bamboo with a soft sword. Such skills, however, couldn’t be taught casually.

“Almost forgot. Kung fu is meant for defeating enemies, not for casual teaching,” Xu Qing remarked, snapping out of his thoughts. "If everyone learned martial arts like at the end of Shaolin Soccer, society would be in chaos. Not everyone can stay as laid-back as me."

Han Feizi had warned long ago: martial heroes violate the law by using their skills. Such figures, often arrogant and convinced of their invincibility, would rely on some powerful faction to act unlawfully. Others, riding on their fame in the martial world, would form gangs of followers and enforcers, ultimately disrupting societal order.

Jiang He showed little interest in opening a school, her mind still preoccupied with completing her self-media business loop. She absently twirled a long, new red string around her fingers, having wound it multiple times.

Back home, she unpacked the groceries, but instead of cooking right away, she disappeared into her room. When she emerged, she held the crescent-shaped jade pendant she had brought with her upon arrival. The original short string had been replaced with the long red string, which she handed to Xu Qing.@@@@

“I saw someone selling this string outside for fifty cents, so I bought one. You can wear it around your neck.”

“You’re giving it to me?” Xu Qing was surprised.

“Mm-hmm.”

“Does this count as a token of love?”

After seeing players in the Duel Arena slashing around like maniacs, she had only recently begun paying attention to character stats. Before, she just equipped whatever the game provided and smashed through levels.

Jiang He ignored Xu Qing’s leg-patting and only remembered her shoes after a moment. Deciding it didn’t matter, she let him rest her leg on his lap, leaning sideways in her chair as she controlled her character roaming the land of Arad.

"Most costumes have to be bought. Sometimes events will give out a piece or two, like that hat of yours."

"It’s ugly."

“That’s because you didn’t collect the full set. There’s also a Christmas outfit and pants. If you wore those, it’d look festive.” Xu Qing massaged her leg to relieve her tension.

Grocery shopping was no easy task, and Jiang He’s activity range was expanding daily. Ever since attending that lecture, she seemed to have discovered a new world. She used to ignore flyers handed out on the street, but now she pored over supermarket sale flyers, always wanting to stock up on deals.

No matter how far it was, she’d walk there on foot, notifying Xu Qing on WeChat. He still couldn’t fathom how she managed to trek to a supermarket eight blocks away just to buy discounted tissues.

“When you’re clearing maps, clothes don’t matter. Skills take care of everything. But in the Duel Arena, you have two choices. First, keep using this weak account with a shabby Christmas hat to beat opponents and climb the ranks, showcasing raw skill. Second, get a fancy set of gear, crush your opponents with power and equipment, and climb even higher.”

Jiang He shook her head. “I haven’t lost yet, so spending money isn’t worth it.”

"You’ve only played for a few hours. Eventually, you’ll see how important equipment and costumes are." Xu Qing was unconvinced.

Although she’d been livestreaming for several days, she only played for an hour a day and hadn’t even broken 1,000 points. It had been a while since Xu Qing last played, so he wasn’t sure how the current scoring system matched up with the old Duel Arena ranks. But he figured it must be low-tier based on her opponents. The high ranks were bound to have plenty of cheaters. Since Jiang He hadn’t encountered any, she probably wasn’t there yet.

“I have a Christmas hat,” Jiang He said, pointing to her screen.

She decided to wear the ridiculous hat and dominate the Duel Arena.

“What does ‘Christmas’ mean? Is it about the birth of a saint?” She hovered her mouse over the hat, examining it. When she first started the game, she only focused on farming and wore whatever she had.

"It’s a foreign holiday. An old man wears this hat and a red suit, delivering gifts in stockings," Xu Qing explained. "I saw him once as a kid. Later, when he got too old, he handed over the business to me. I’m now the appointed successor for China, responsible for delivering gifts. What do you want? Just hang up a long sock, and I’ll put your gift inside."

“...”

Jiang He shifted her gaze to Xu Qing’s face. Seeing his sincere expression, she wanted to say something but stopped herself.

She hadn’t yet learned how to roast him.